do they know it's thanksgiving

firstly, I can't believe we just ate thanksgiving dinner with a side of cranbelly jelly, sliced straight from the can. something about those acidic rings of jelly, with those ridges pressed into the sides makes me want to really put up a fight. like there isn't enough wrong with the world?

second, since when did they start showing five episodes of the twilight zone and calling it a marathon? and the worst five, too. you never let the viewers pick! they're idiots! they've probably got slices of cranberry jelly from a can on their tables!

gah. what exactly am I thankful for again?



o, right.

déjà vu

it's the overabundance, I think, that always did me in. skies, sunshine, entertainment, warmth, love. endless and overwhelming. I'm basking in it but at the same time choking from the excess.

I remembered this as I sat down looking at the table set with alverta osetra caviar, lobster, and two kinds of foie gras. if food is the way to your heart, I can feel mine being blocked off by impenetrable plaques built up by extravagances.


poops, you should've traded places with me these past few meals. you know I'd be just as happy with a stack of naan and a cadbury milk tray. but for future reference:

valentino: I'm not so in love with italian restaurants, although, there's something to be said about a place that says, "if you don't see your favorite dish, ask for it and we will produce it for you. if you don't have a favorite dish, tell us and we will create one for you." I now have a favorite dish.
urasawa: sushi is as sushi does, unless it's so overwhelming that you can only sit there and tell the waiter, whatever. just bring me whatever.
providence: the 8-course dessert tasting menu was worth everything. how else can you explain being compelled to put something described as just "bacon, peanut butter and banana" in your mouth?

too late

today I came across a letter written me by M, during a time when I thought my promises would take hold and melt away the endless calvary of tomorrows marching over the horizon, aiming themselves directly at me. it was a time when I thought I was strong enough to fight for ideas like forever, and that my intentions were pure enough to bind me to the future when they'd be cashed in.



it exhausts me to read it now. all that expectation. I want to climb into my bed and go to sleep, breathing in the warmth of yesterday's sunshine, thick and heavy and tasting of the ocean. I almost picked up the telephone.



instead, I folded it and tucked it away, between pages 121 and 122. I'll take it out again when I'm a better person.

С Новым годом

I'm wishing myself a happy new year.

The kind that's capped on either end with endless blue skies, and just absolutely bursting with sunshine. The glittering amber-golden kind that you usually only find in 70s vitamin commercials.

And I'm wishing all of you some of the same.

Hooray, 2008.